Devotionals for the Heart: How to cultivate an attitude of gratitude

Cultivate Gratitude
A devotional by Peg Arnold

“Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness.”

—Colossians 3:17 (MSG)

It was early in the day when I woke up and went to enjoy my morning coffee.

Sitting on the kitchen counter was a delicious cinnamon roll. My thoughtful husband had gotten up early and traveled out into the wintry weather to buy this sweet treat for me. My mouth was watering as I heated the roll and fixed my coffee. He knew I loved sugary and gooey breakfast treats.

I sat down in a comfy seat in front of the fireplace and took my first bite with great expectation. It was dry, bready, and not as sweet as I had anticipated. The first words out of my mouth were, “What’s wrong with this?” Not a single word of gratitude to my husband for his unexpected efforts but a critical comment with disdain instead.

My husband playfully replied, “Well, good morning to you too, and thank you dear for the unexpected surprise!”

I immediately backtracked and became defensive as I made excuses for why I responded the way I did. When I finally expressed my appreciation, it was a futile attempt. To make matters worse, I have been trying to focus on cultivating a thankful heart and practicing an attitude of gratitude. Instead, I failed to demonstrate appreciation for those whom I love most dearly. It happens when I least expect it and instead of apologizing, I become defensive and try to make excuses. Does this ever happen to you?

It’s easy to express gratitude when everything is going well and we are well-rested. The challenge to be grateful occurs when we are tired, distracted, or our expectations of others have not been met. Some examples you might identify with are when the garbage was taken out of the house but the trashcan in one room was forgotten, or the car was cleaned but the windows were still dirty, or the kitchen has been cleaned but the counters still have crumbs on them. Instead of responding with gratitude for the effort made, we sometimes start complaining and pointing out what was left undone.

Throughout his letters in The Holy Bible, Paul instructs early believers in God who were followers of Jesus Christ not to complain and grumble. He models being content in all circumstances, and thankful in all things. When we respond to others with criticism or defensiveness, it can strain our relationships. In contrast, words and actions of love, appreciation, and sometimes biting our tongues (self-control) can strengthen our personal connections with the people we love.

After I apologized to my husband, I asked for his help in keeping me accountable if I began to complain and grumble again. I realize these are selfish responses that can negatively impact others. Choosing to be content and thankful in all circumstances is not always my first response, but I am working on it.

As we learn to cultivate an attitude of gratitude, may we increase our awareness of how our responses affect those around us. Let us each strive to plant the seeds of thankfulness in all we say and do while learning to recognize and pull out the weeds of discontent, criticism, and defensiveness.

Let’s Pray:

Dear Lord,

We want to come to you with a contrite heart. We know we have been selfish in our attitudes and expectations around those we love most. Help us to recognize when we become defensive and critical of others. Teach us how to cultivate the attitudes of love, appreciation, humility, and kindness. Thank You for your patience with me whenever I falter. Help us to demonstrate that same patience You give us to others. In Christ’s name we pray. Amen.

Song of Reflection: “Gratitude” by Brandon Lake. Listen to it here.

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Author Bio:

Peg Arnold, Speaker/Author/Teacher is a Drama Queen for Jesus. 

Her vibrant, interactive, and soul-stirring messages encourage all to embrace their God-given value. As a mom, wife, nana, mentor, with a master’s in counseling, she connects on a personal basis by sharing her joys and challenges of many life experiences through her dramas, messages, and witness. Whether talking with a friend over coffee or addressing hundreds of people at a conference, her passion for equipping women is contagious.

She has published devotions on YouVersion and in the Upper Room. In addition, she has contributed to two Chicken Soup for the Soul books, three anthologies, numerous articles, and blogs. Her devotional, Devotions for the Distracted Heart, received a 2022 OASIS award.

Peg desires everyone to know that their story is important and has a purpose. She grew up in Michigan and raised her family in Maryland. Later in life, Peg and her husband relocated close to their family in Colorado.

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