Devotionals for the Heart: What to do when God says no to your prayers

What is Your Response When God Says No?
A devotional written by Colette Lawrence

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”— Romans 8:28 (NIV)

When my siblings and I were children and asked our parents for things, the answer that excited and filled us with joy was “Yes.” Our ears seemed not trained to hear any other response.

In our limited mind view, hearing “no” meant we were denied what we through our young eyes thought was best for us, and we pouted or threw tantrums. We believed what we asked for was what was best for us, and hearing that response made us feel that our parents did not love us because if they did, they would have given us what we wanted. This is how we respond to the Lord at times.

2 Samuel 12 recounts how David sinned against the Lord by sleeping with Uriah's wife. The Lord sent Nathan the prophet to confront him about it, and he acknowledged his sin. Bathsheba became pregnant, but that child would die according to the word of the Lord. You may wonder what this has to do with God saying no. It has everything to do with it. The child became ill, and David decided to fast. This is a spiritual discipline where you abstain from eating food and drinking. You spend a lot of time praying to God from the depths of your heart about what you hope He will answer “yes” to in response. Perhaps in fasting, David thought the Lord would heal his baby and the child would live. But God said “no” in the answer to David’s prayers. David’s newborn baby died.

How often has God said no to your request, and your response is just like King David’s initial idea to fast and pray hoping God will change His mind? Maybe you haven't, but I can recall situations when God said no to me, and yes was the answer I thought I needed. My response was to fast and pray in strong hope that He would change His mind, but He didn't.

Sometimes we forget we serve a Sovereign God who knows the end from the beginning (Isaiah 46:10), what we need, when we need it, and what is best for us.

The Lord tells us in Matthew 7:11 (NIV), “If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!” Therefore, if we petition God for our needs and in His Sovereignty, He says no, then it stands to reason that His no is based on Him knowing all the facts, what is best for us and not giving something to us that He already knows would ultimately not work for our good.

Have you ever been so desperate for God to do something for you, so desperate for His yes, that when He responds differently than you expected, you are left in a tailspin, feeling dejected, neglected, and wondering if God doesn't understand what you need? That was me. In those times, I used to pout and be miffed at God because He denied me something I believed was best for me.

As we read further in the key scripture above, King David fasted and prayed. God still said “no” and his baby died. Consider David’s response from 2 Samuel 12:18-20 (NIV) that reads, “On the seventh day the child died. David’s attendants were afraid to tell him that the child was dead, for they thought, “While the child was still living, he wouldn’t listen to us when we spoke to him. How can we now tell him the child is dead? He may do something desperate.” David noticed that his attendants were whispering among themselves, and he realized the child was dead. “Is the child dead?” he asked. “Yes,” they replied, “he is dead.” Then David got up from the ground. After he had washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes, he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. Then he went to his own house, and at his request they served him food, and he ate.”

David's response should be our model response. He hoped he could change God's heart, but he couldn't because the baby wasn't part of God's plan for him. Instead of pouting and withholding his love from God in worship, David changed his posture. He cleansed himself, and then he went to worship the Lord Jesus Christ.

When we hear God's response to our request, and it doesn't meet our expectations, I believe the Lord desires us to come to Him, let Him know how we are feeling, and choose to worship Him instead. We need to trust in His Sovereignty and trust His heart for us. God’s response of “no” is never meant to withdraw or withhold anything good from you. But because He is all-knowing and has your absolute best interest at heart, if He says “no” then that answer is in our best interest.

What are you struggling with today? Have you fasted and prayed about it, and God has still said no? Would you choose today to respond like David by accepting God’s “no” then worshipping God for who He is, the King of all kings, the Creator of Heaven and Earth? Remember, God is your Heavenly Father and He loves you.

Today, let's choose to worship God instead of worry and trust that His plans for us are perfect. Whatever God’s response to our petitions are, our responsibility is to acknowledge His Lordship and Sovereignty then be reminded that God always work all things together for our good (Romans 8:28).

Let’s Pray:

Father God,

How grateful we are for your love and the good plans You have for us. We confess that we don’t always understand when our requests aren’t answered in the way we expect and want. Please forgive us for doubting your good plans for us. Thank You for being Sovereign Lord. Thanks for the assurance that we can trust You. Help us to remember that You always keep your word. Strengthen us as we wait on You.

In Jesus’s name I pray. Amen.

Song of Reflection: “Sovereign (Live)” by Chris Tomlin. Listen to it here.

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Author Bio:

Colette Lawrence is an empowered woman who inspires women to be who they were created to be. Her core message is empowerment. She is an author, certified life coach, podcast host, and trainer with the Maxwell Leadership team. 

Colette believes that an empowered woman empowers others and is powerful in knowing who she is and what she can accomplish. Colette is on a mission to impact the lives of the women assigned to her, whether she is their coach or trainer or shares a word that will transform their lives.

Colette utilizes her Christian principles as the base of all her engagements. She is passionate about fulfilling her life purpose of empowering women to know who they are, rebuild their confidence, and use their voices as tools to uplift themselves and others.

​​She is the founder of the M.E.E. Movement L.L.C., a faith-based empowerment ministry business that helps women of faith rebuild their confidence and use their voice to walk in their purpose through life coaching, mentoring, and empowerment speaking. Colette believes in using the gifts God has given her to help women be who God has called them to be and ultimately fulfill the purpose for which they were created. She lives by Romans 8:28 (NIV), that promises, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

A native of Jamaica, Colette resides in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. She is the mother of two beautiful young women, a son-in-love, and two grandsons.

Colette enjoys reading, writing, watching good movies, and chatting with her daughters and friends.

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Connect with Colette:
Blog: https://www.colettemarie.online/blog
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/colettemarie_cm/
Website: https://www.colettemarie.online/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ColetteMarie-cmc
Podcast: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2367935
Email: Colettemarieonline@gmail.com

Devotionals for the Heart: Reasons why you need to let God drive

God’s Driving Lessons
A devotional by Karen Marstaller

“Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!”

—Psalm 27:14 (ESV)

The other day, our oldest granddaughter came over to spend the night and have a much-anticipated visit. One of the highlights of our time together is always to go to a fun, trendy, downtown bookstore.

We came up with a plan that included our fifteen-year-old who has a brand-new learner’s permit. She is allowed to drive with a licensed driver in the passenger seat, and I am one of those, so we decided we would make the two-mile trip with her behind the wheel.

The drive from our house to downtown started uneventfully, but when we reached the congested city center, we were faced with a massive roadblock. Construction crews with their heavy equipment were everywhere, digging up whole lanes of streets amid a myriad of vehicles of all shapes and sizes.

We were behind a semi-trailer and were poking along as we tried to reach our destination. The problem wasn’t the truck in front of us, but the line of vehicles behind us. The truck driver attempted a left turn off the narrow lane we were on. Barrels barricaded the deep holes where workers were employed to restructure the street. His path narrowed even more.

As many know, most drivers of big rigs often have a hard time navigating a very sharp turn, and this one was particularly tricky. Half of both streets were under construction. Our fellow driver made it about halfway through the turn when he stopped and started to back up in order to have a straight shot through the intersection. That’s when the line of traffic behind us grew larger. It’s also when the lady behind us (who couldn’t see the problem because of all the huge equipment) decided to lay on her horn.

My granddaughter was tense already, but when the noise behind us blasted in her ear, she asked, “What do I do?”

“Just wait right here. None of us can go anywhere right now,” I said.

About that time, one of the workers jumped out of the huge hole in the street and started moving the barricades just enough to let the big truck pull through the intersection. The traffic light turned red again, and so we waited a little longer and then we also turned left. From there we were able to slowly make our way to our destination.

Sometimes life takes a different turn for us, but there’s a lesson in our story if we’ll look closely.

That truck driver had a definite plan in mind. From high in his cab, he saw all the roadblocks, along with all the cars and the workers, but he knew he could get through the very tight squeeze. He was slow and methodical, and he carefully maneuvered his vehicle through a tough spot to reach his goal.

Our responsibility, waiting patiently behind him, was to let him do his job, and to not become worried or upset because it was taking longer than we wanted. We experienced peace in our car, unlike the one behind us who was anxious to be on her way.

It’s like that in our relationship with God. From His seat on high, He sees the road ahead of us with all the speed bumps, twists, and hardships along the way. Our Heavenly Father knows that we often need to slow down and wait for His timing, His plan, and His work to clear the path for us. God is in charge, and if we will wait patiently for Him, we’ll see our next step on the road He has chosen for us.

We can’t be pestered by those around us who may have different opinions about the route He planned. Instead, we cling to His peace as we navigate unfamiliar paths. Ultimately, we will continue to follow Him for all our days, always waiting patiently for His lead and His timetable. And we will rest in His peace, even in the middle of a seemingly impassable crossroad in our life.

Let’s Pray: Dear Holy God, we thank You and praise You for leading us through this obstacle course of life. You are always with us, guiding us and helping us to see Your plan. We ask for patience, Lord. We want to walk in joyful expectation as we see Your kingdom come and Your will be done. Thank You, Heavenly Father. In Jesus’s Name I pray. Amen.

Song of Reflection: “I Know the Plans (Audrey’s Song)” by Damaris Carbaugh. Listen here.

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Author Bio:

Karen Marstaller is a retired high school teacher who spent most of her career challenging creative students to write. Her heart is for her readers. 

She writes to encourage them, to make them laugh, to show them that life is a beautiful journey, and regardless of their past, to show them that there is joy ahead if they will just keep looking.

Karen and her husband live in central Texas in a sweet little home that they completely remodeled. They enjoy spending time with their family, which includes seven precious grandchildren.

Most of all, Karen writes in obedience to the command to love your neighbor, to offer a cup of water to those who are dying of thirst, and to comfort others with the comfort she has received.

You can reach Karen by emailing her at this address: klmarstaller@gmail.com

Devotionals for the Heart: Leadership

Shifts and Stages: My Reflections on Leadership 
A devotional by Chaplain Paul Anderson

“Moses and Aaron walked from the assembled congregation to the Tent of Meeting and threw themselves face down on the ground. And they saw the Glory of God.”

—Numbers 20:6 (The Message)

As a leader, I have been ruminating on two topics: Succession Planning and Generational shifts.

While pondering these topics, I was inspired to consider the leadership of the Old Testament patriarch, Moses. He was challenged by the privilege of leading over a million people through epochs of emancipation, the storming and norming flow of freedom and the responsibilities that come with sovereignty. He then led them into a renewal of spiritual singularity and prepared them for the conquests of nation building.

Over forty years, two generations, Moses led with divinely guided vision. His successes were not without frustration. When his frustrations peaked, there was always a calming conversation with divinity, until one day the conversation came before the conflict.

The fourth book of the Hebrew Pentateuch, Numbers 20:1-12, tells the story of a crucial conversation between Moses and the congregation of the nomadic Israelites. Miriam had died recently so the setting of this conflict is during a time of national grief and literal drought.

Once again, without water, the hoard of people hurled accusations against Moses instead of trusting God to provide for them as He had done previously. The story says that Moses and Aaron retreated to the temple to pray and the presence of God met them there with clear guidance. God said to Moses “Take the staff. Assemble the community, you and your brother Aaron. Speak to that rock that’s right in front of them and it will give water. You will bring water out of the rock for them; congregation and cattle will both drink.” (The Message)

Dutifully Moses calls the community together. Once assembled, for some ungodly reason, Moses deviated from the clear guidance of God. Instead of speaking to the rock, Moses verbally accosted the people, then he struck the rock twice with his staff. Water flowed, but God was not pleased.

In a subsequent and more crucial conversation, God informs Moses and Aaron that they had failed the test of faith by acting with public irreverence. Because of that mistake, they would not be anointed to lead the people into the new phase of their national development.

Ouch! Forty years, two generations of enduring the heights, depth and breadth of leadership were truncated by an inordinate display of old school leadership. I was taught, in my youth, to believe that God is good all the time, but I struggled to see the goodness of God in this situation. I always thought that it was cruel of God, to dispossess a man from the vision that He had given.

Wasn’t it God who put this mantle upon the reluctant Moses? Now, after leading people, many of whom were two generations younger than he was, who did not grow up how and where he did, whose relationship with Egypt was history rather than biography, his moment of frustration was unforgivable? That did not seem good to me, until I read it with different eyes.

Harold Kushner, a prominent rabbi and author of the book titled, Overcoming Life's Disappointments: Learning from Moses How to Cope with Frustration, suggested that God was actually blessing Moses and Aaron. He was protecting them from the inevitable disappointment of seeing fantasy become experience. Rarely does reality match the verdant colors and contours of imagination. Fulfilled fantasies are often accompanied by disillusionment.

No doubt, Moses and Aaron were disappointed, but Rabbi Kushner paints the blessing of disappointment in the following phrase:

“…Moses had been the right leader to bring a nation of slaves out of Egypt and lead them to Sinai, but he would be the wrong leader to take them into the battle for the Promised Land. He was too old, too tied to the way things had been done in the past. God was saying to Moses as He had once bid Moses say to Pharaoh, “It is time to let my people go.” (Kushner 2006 pg. 157)

The moment at the rock near Kadesh is an apt illustration of transitional awareness. God knew that Moses had become old and though physically strong had become worn down and emotionally depleted by burn out. His leadership style was probably three generations removed from the people he was leading. Burned out, and angry, perhaps more with God than the people, Moses defaulted to the same tactic that had worked miraculously with the first generation assuming that it would be as effective for the third generation.

What force had accomplished 40 years before, was no longer an effective motivator. God wanted him to model a kinder, gentler, contemporary and forward leaning modality of leadership. Speaking to the rock, might have been a metaphor for praying with anticipation. Seeing the water flow in response to the conversation may have been God’s method of manifesting effective human connection to His power, much like when Jesus taught the disciples how to pray.

It is always good to know what time it is. It was time for a generational shift. Fortunately, Moses had been grooming some younger people for leadership. He may not have anticipated that the change would come so soon, but he was prepared.

Who and how are you preparing people in your family and field for their turns to lead?

If you are younger, who and how are you choosing and serving your mentors?

Succession planning requires a balance of remembering and forgetting. Generational shifting requires a balance of dreaming and doing. In a subsequent devotional, I will share some thoughts on how those four poles of preparation can be applied in your life. 

For today, I’m leaving you with this nugget of wisdom: Listen to the voice of Divinity (God) and do what you hear.

~*~
Author Bio:

Chaplain Anderson served for 20 years as a U.S. Navy Chaplain. Over 26 years of active duty, he was promoted through the ranks from Seaman Apprentice (E2) to his final rank as Commander (O5) in the Chaplain’s Corps.

Prior to his Naval career, Chaplain Anderson pastored in the Allegheny East and Potomac Conferences of Seventh-day Adventists. His undergraduate preparation for ministry was completed at Washington Adventist University in Takoma Park, Md.

He has subsequently earned four graduate degrees: a Master of Divinity from Andrews University in Michigan, a Master of Education in Counseling and Personnel Services from the University of Maryland in College Park, Maryland and a Masters of Sacred Theology in Religion and Culture from Boston University. His Doctor of Ministry degree was conferred by Wesley Theological Seminary in Washington, D.C.

Chaplain Anderson also completed four units of Clinical Pastoral Education at Walter Reed Army Medical Center. He also holds certifications in Suicide Awareness and Prevention, Civil Mediation, Alternative Workplace Dispute Resolution, Temperament Analysis, Marriage Enrichment, Workforce Diversity, and is a certified Life Coach.

You may connect with Chaplain Anderson via email at this address, psanderson75@gmail.com.