Devotionals for the Heart: How to sit in someone's sorrow and share hope

A Love that Won’t Try to Fix Anything
A devotional by Patti Schultz, Ed.D.

“Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.”

—Romans 12:15 (NKJV)

There is a love that never tries to fix anything. It pulls up a chair. It sits down in someone else's sorrow and refuses to leave early. Scripture gives that love a name.

Grief rarely knocks. It just arrives; however it wants, and it never leaves the way it came. Denial doesn't announce itself. It shows up in small, harmless-looking ways: two cups of coffee poured out of habit before she remembers or a hand reaching for the phone to call someone who won't answer. This is not foolishness. It is a heart taking in only as much truth as it can hold. If you love someone in this fog, don't correct it. Just sit with her.

Then anger comes, and it comes hot. Her fists clench. Her questions grow edges. Why this? Why now? This fire is usually love with nowhere left to go. I've learned it doesn't need to be tidied up. It just needs room to burn.

Bargaining follows close behind, the quiet negotiations that circle back at two in the morning. What if we had caught it sooner? What if that last conversation had gone differently? These thoughts rarely lead anywhere, and they do not have to. They only need somewhere safe to be spoken aloud, and sometimes that somewhere is simply you, listening without trying to answer.

Depression settles in without asking permission. It moves into her shoulders, into her mornings, into the space behind her eyes. There is no silver lining that fits here. What she needs is someone willing to sit down inside the weight with her, unafraid of the quiet.

And somewhere in there, unevenly and without a schedule, acceptance arrives. Not because the loss shrinks but because she learns to carry it differently. It rarely comes on the timeline anyone expects, and no one should feel late for it. I learned all of this in a season I never would have chosen. I was moving through recurrent pregnancy loss, one IVF cycle after another, grief tucked into ordinary moments: a grocery aisle, a baby shower I couldn't skip, and the silence after another test result.

One cold evening I returned to a support group, to show a young woman how to compound or mix her own in vitro fertilization (IVF) injection medication. Her hands were shaking, just as mine had been through the years. I expected this support group, this task, this assistance would be too emotionally hard for fragile me. Instead, I felt a peace I hadn't felt in years, not because my own grief had lifted, but because it had finally found somewhere to go. Holding her hand steady, I watched two griefs sit in the same small room without either one needing to leave.

That is the day Romans 12:15 stopped being a verse to me. It became something I lived. To mourn with those who mourn is to walk into someone's sorrow and stay a while. No agenda. No timeline. No requirement that she feel better before you're willing to sit down. This is love with its sleeves rolled up.

Let's Pray:

Lord, teach us to sit before we speak. Give us the courage to stay in rooms that feel too heavy, and the humility to receive comfort when we are the ones grieving. Where we are angry, meet us gently. Where we are numb, meet us patiently. And when you place someone in our path who is hurting, let our presence be enough. Let it look like You. In Jesus' name, I pray. Amen.

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Song of Reflection #1: “Rest On Us” (feat. Brandon Lake & Eniola Abioye) | Maverick City Music | UPPERROOM | TRIBL Listen to it here. 

Song of Reflection #2: “Way Maker” by Leeland (ASL cover by Deaf Millennial Project). Listen to it here.

Song of Reflection #3: “Build My Life” by Pat Barrett (ASL cover). Listen to it here.

Song of Reflection #4: “Sound of Surviving” by Nichole Nordeman. Listen to it here.

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Author Bio:

Dr. Patti Schultz’s inspiring journey weaves a tapestry of compassion, resilience, and divine hope. 

Formerly a public school principal, professor, teacher, and interpreter for the deaf, she now dedicates her life to a heartfelt ministry rooted in her personal experiences.

As a mother to three miracle boys here on Earth and a member of a heavenly soccer team, Patti’s story is one of unwavering faith and profound love. Her decade-long battle with infertility and recurrent loss fuels her deep compassion for grieving mothers, guiding them toward healing through the comforting embrace of Jesus Christ’s garment.

Patti’s gentle wisdom offers a safe haven for women navigating pain, reminding them they are never alone. Through her ministry, she seeks to envelop grieving mothers in divine comfort, encouraging hope, renewal, and the reassurance that God's love is always near, wrapping them in His compassionate hem as they walk the path to healing.

Living in northern Michigan, she cherishes precious moments with family and community, drawing strength from faith and connection.

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Connect with Patti:
Website: pattischultz.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.pattischultz/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Dr.Patti.Schultz
Email: dr.patti.schultz@gmail.com